Additional Posts In This Series
Welcome back! I’m delighted by the responses to these posts so far, and I hope you enjoy reading them as much as I enjoy writing them. 🙂
BATTERIES, or, Refilling Your Creative Tanks
I love horror movies. Good, bad, hilarious, terrible–it’s all entertainment, and it’s all narrative. I believe visual/audio mediums are a perfect vehicle for horror stories. I just watched [REC] and the terrifying sequel, [REC]2. (As I said on twitter, these are a grand blend of zombie possession found footage.) On the queue I have a selection of movies pulled from this list.
Why so much horror, when I’m writing/revising a kinky, lyric fantasy novel?
Similar to when you use any electronic device that runs on battery power, sooner or later you need to plug it in and recharge. Or it stops working. (And if this is a horror movie, you really do not want your flashlight or camera batteries dying on you in the third act.)
Brains have electric currents in them, and I mean, HOW COOL IS THAT? There’s also a creative component. For people who are focused on narrative construction–telling stories–we run off the storytelling batteries wired deep in our minds and hearts. We operate the story-apps, create new narrative, sketch artistic mediums into existence, and we do all this by pulling energy from ourselves. We use those batteries. So eventually we need to replenish what we used.
Everyone has a unique way of powering up again after depleting their store of energy. Everyone’s charge time until full is different.
Maybe you read a lot, or binge-watch a show on Netflix, or go hiking, or hide in a dark cave and hibernate until unwary adventurers disturb your crypt and unleash an ancient, terrifying evil into the world.
For me, I love watching horror movies.
Regardless of quality, they generally satisfy my three main criteria for battery-refueling:
- It has a narrative. Even if it’s one I’ve seen a hundred times, even if it’s barely there, even if it’s choppy and WTF, there is some semblance of story construction going on.
- It provides stimuli. Visual and auditory, often with a textual component since I tend to watch movies or shows with subtitles or Closed Captioning [CC] turned on. (It takes a lot of pre-planning and emotional prep to see a movie in theaters, because there is a thing as too much stimuli, so most often when I binge watch horror, I do so from the comfort of my couch, with headphones on and lights dimmed.) I’m a filmmaker as well as a writer, so I’m looking at the composition, the pacing, the lighting, the sound design, the makeup. My brain then subconsciously runs a translation program wherein it digests the visual/auditory input and churns out a low-frequency running commentary in my mind, wherein I’m narrating the story as I see it to myself as I watch. This translation process takes much longer with purely written text, and I’m a slow reader; but I can, comparatively, watch a movie in about two hours, and receive many of the same benefits from narrative deconstruction as I can from written fiction. I get prose-level feedback from reading (I’m consciously or unconsciously analyzing the specific words, placement, layout, etc), while I get craft-level feedback just as well from visual storytelling.
- It’s not the broadly-catagorized genre I’m writing in. Does The Collars We Wear have horror elements? Of course! It has some creepy as fuck imagery and ideas going on. But it is still not structurally or aesthetically horror. (I can also watch action movies in the same headspace as horror movies.) It has a specific feel for fantasy, to me, which is why, at the moment, I have a difficult time reading or watching straight-up fantasy to recharge. I need the distance of genre or aesthetics or trope-wrangling when I’m recharging. Once I am done with this project, I will happily devour more fantasy in all forms–shorts, novels, movies, art. Until then, when I need recharging, I turn to one of my favorite categories: horror.
Thursday was my day off this week, and after I got up and fed Bucky (pictured above), I was about to open the laptop and do some words. But there was a very specific feeling of tiredness knotted around me. I recognized this.
Since Sunday, I have written–between blog posts, synopses, and fiction–9,500+ words. That is more than I have written in months.
REMINDER: There is no “right” speed at which to write. Fast, slow, interdimensional–what is right for you is valid, acceptable, and does not need to be compared to anyone else. There is no “right” way to write, either. You do not have to write every day to be a writer. All you need is to write. How, and why, and when–those are personal details. You do what works for you. That’s all that matters.
I used up a lot of batteries this week. Blog posts are just as much work a brand new fiction, for me. 🙂 I love writing them, but they are not easy. So between all these words, I was getting low on battery.
In an attempt to be a smart!Merc and not wreck myself as I have too often in the past by trying to press through to unachievable goals or comparisons with others, I took the day off from fiction.
I watched horror movies, I listened to more of The Haunting of Hill House, and I took a nap.
You need energy if you want to run the various functions in your brain and produce creative output. It’s okay to take a break when you need it, to refuel and recharge.
I mean, even Energizer batteries run low eventually. (Don’t let the commercials lie to you.)
Whether you are writing new words, revising old ones,
or running from zombies in a quarantined apartment building*, it is okay to take a break.
Rest. Recharge. Play games or read books or watch shows or take a walk or sleep or [your choice activity here]. Whatever works for you.
Burning out is, unfortunately, a thing that happens to everyone at some point. It sucks. If you feel fragile, if you feel depleted, if you feel down–it will pass, if you let yourself take the time you need and be kind to yourself if it’s not instantaneous. Self-care is a revolutionary act for many of us.
No, it is not always easy. Often, it is hard for so many reasons. Hard and impossible are not the same word, even if at times they seem indistinguishable.
I believe in you. ❤ I want you to take care of yourself, and it may take many different forms. I can’t tell you what to do on this front. It is as personal as the stories you tell. It may not look like anyone else’s version of self-care and recharging. (I mean, so long as you’re not a serial killer or something like that.)
You take care of your mental health needs, you recharge your batteries the best way that suits you, so you can continue to share your stories with the world.
*Maybe don’t stop and take a break if this is the situation. It might not end well.
So what’s next? Well, personally I plan to watch another horror film or two and then go to bed. (Hai there, anticipated WTF dreams… o.O)
After that? Well. Tomorrow I think I will feel more refreshed, more recharged, and can dive back into organizing sections into a Scrivener file and adding new words into the novel.
❤ ❤ ❤ to you all! Keep those batteries well-charged.
NEXT: [Merc gives up trying to predict the next topic in an ongoing series of blog posts at this point] WE’LL HAVE TO SEE, WON’T WE.