Author Vs. Doubtroach





Panel 1: “Author Vs. Doubtroach” by Merc Rustad

A person sits at a desk, typing on a computer. An arrow points to them that says “author.” They wear an orange hat with the word MERC on it. In the upper left hand corner is a “doubtroach,” a gray tick-like creature with teeth. A thought bubble by the author reads: “Awesome! I just finished a new story! Now I can send it out on submission!”


Panel 2:

Close-up on the doubtroach as it launches itself off the wall, screaming: “NOOOOO!”

Its eyes glow red.


Panel 3:

The doubtroach lands on the keyboard. The author looks startled. The doubtroach says in a speech bubble: “IT SUCKS.”


Panel 4:

Close-up on the author’s face. They say, hesitantly, “But…”


Panel 5:

Close-up on the doubtroach. It says in all caps: “NO.”

All around in faint shades of gray text are doubts, such as no one will read this, you suck, stop writing, give up.


Panel 6:

Close-up of the author’s face again. They raise one eyebrow.


Panel 7:

Back to close-up of the doubtroach. Its eyes glow bright red in fury.


Panel 8:

The author smirks at the camera as they FLICK the doubtroach off the keyboard. It flies towards the wall, screaming: “Ahhhh!”


Panel 9:

The doubtroach splats against the wall and groans. The author smiles at the computer. The computer screen is filled with a bright purple text: SENT!


Panel 10:

*FIN* is written in bright purple, with lots of stars surrounding it. Merc Rustad has signed their name in the bottom right hand corner.




  1. Just dropping in to say that I still love the term doubtroaches. I think I actually like it better than brain weasels, since weasels can be kind of cute, and roaches are… well, roaches. Now to clear the infestation…


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